Sunday Supplement

There are some fucking stupid people with driving licences. On your bike -- even when you're on the cycle track -- the sounds of the cars seem to be magnified and focused, and you can sense (more clearly than when you're in a car yourself) just how aggressive, and unnecessary, and reckless, and infantile some of these people's manouvres are.

On your bike, you get a bit warier of other road users, and it's always prudent to assume that they can't see you, and that they are fucking idiots. These starting assumptions are richly reinforced by experience. Like...six cars of the same model, obviously racing, on the A44, and motorcyclist joining in, veering in and out of traffic. Fucking morons. On your bike, you realise how fast cars are going, and you feel very fragile and vulnerable. (There's a metaphor here...I'll dig it out and overuse it in due course...)

Anyway. I did my long cycle ride, despite these distractions. And I did reach a decision/resolution: improve my physical and mental health by...

• Losing 2.5 stones between now and my September vacation. (I've put on 28 lbs in 18 months!)


• Re-establishing a regular exercise routine


• Breaking my current 'excessive bad nutrition' habits (biscuits, beer, chocolate, butter, wine, pies, pizza)

As a mark of commitment, I've cooked up an enormous batch of healthy vegetable curry to act as the highly nutritious base for this week's assault on Mount Lardarse. Yum.